Things are lovely…repeat as necessary.

writing my heart out about living from our hearts

Shifting from Passive to Active Inspiration

with one comment

“Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.” Khalil Gibran

I used to be the busy one, hustling kids, keeping up the house and the yard, getting to work, feeding the masses, rocking it all.  Until I wasn’t anymore.  I’ve been over all the whys and wherefores and the fact is that I’m here at this desk, trying to do something.  I have time to write and that’s what I’m doing and sometimes, it’s hard to be inspired.

Time breaks down into two meridians for me, Before and After.  Before, inspiration was a sunset, a concert with Scott, shopping with my girls.  My kind of inspiration illuminated only me and never challenged me to move beyond.  My mind was locked into a place where I could only see things as fitting my drama or not. The not part was frightening because I couldn’t get beyond the world I had built around myself.

Here’s the honest truth: I saw myself as small and incapable of moving beyond the little suburban movie in my head.  It wasn’t that I didn’t want to contribute more or grow.  I honestly couldn’t see what that looked like and to move forward would have felt like stepping off a high-dive blindfolded and I was just too scared.

That was then.

“When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bonds.”  Patanjali

The pain of the separation did break me open and my thinking is unfurling like a banner in the wind.  Like a moment of conversion or the admission of addiction, everything I see is with new eyes.  Here I am in a visually inspiring wonderland of grapevines, river bends, geysers and foggy hillsides, and these things do fill me.  They are energizing and uplifting.  It challenges my psyche everyday that this much beauty is real and that I am standing in it. This sort of Passive Inspiration is good in that being energized, uplifted and challenged is good.

In the After time, I am drawn to a new way of feeling inspired.  What is beautiful and filling out there is the potential to create.  Active Inspiration pulls at me, moves me forward.  It is about being inspired to build or create something new.  Here is what inspires me today:  the extraordinary project of the new life in front of me, the great purpose of a new way of relating to my daughters, and of forming a new kind of partnership with Scott.

Active Inspiration pulls at me, moves me forward.  It is about being inspired to build or create something new.

  • I am actively inspired to stand in my own authority, something I’ve never done in 44 years.
  • I am actively inspired to keep open and honest communication with those that matter most.
  • I am actively inspired to meet the needs of those that rely on me.
  • I am actively inspired to take the burden before me and offer some relief  to the one who will be my partner in life.

What that looks like to me is working, writing my heart out, saving and taking apart every wall I find in my mind.  It looks like being as kind to myself as others.  It looks like a whole bunch of driving until I can be closer to my girls.

What actively inspires you?  What does that look like in real life?

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Written by Shannon Udell

July 22, 2010 at 5:00 am

Posted in Uncategorized

One Response

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  1. Atta girl!

    Auntie Carol

    July 22, 2010 at 8:24 am


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